I am not exactly sure what I am doing lately. Have you ever been at a crossroads in your life where you know that you need to make the "right" decision and everything that you have EVER wanted and imagined in your life lays just on the other side of that decision? But you still have the option to choose to stay right where you are and keep doing what you are doing... it is not a bad place to be, just not the best? That is where I am... The difficult part is the deciding. In all actuality the decision has already been made, it is the walking it out part. Walking it out shows that I am not fully in control. It requires me to let go of what appears to be a few good things in my life currently in hopes of the best things ahead. It means going without now (sacrifice) for what is yet to be.
Frankly, I am tired. I am tired of being continually asked to step up and step out. Do not get me wrong... I am honored and blessed beyond measure.. and it is definitely something that I have asked for and yearn for as sure as I take my next breath. But the part that I always seem to underestimate is the pain. The pain of letting go.... even letting go of the things that are harmful to me. You see, it is because I am afraid if I let go of what I seem to have now, that it means I will never have what I so long for in my heart.
I have made wrong choices willingly over the course of the last few weeks. I have allowed myself to delve into dark places that I thought I was safe from. Or to be even more brutally honest, I thought I was better than. It all comes down to pride, doesn't it? In one way, shape, or form.... it is all about selfishness and pride. It is about what I want, what I feel, what I think that I need. Yes, I do have valid needs that have been pushed aside or discarded for quite some time. But that is not what I am talking about. I have been put here for a greater purpose... I have an assignment to carry out and I am being tricked into diverting my attention from that cause to deal with emotional scars from my past. I know that I am rambling.. and I think that I might not be making any sense at all. But this is all from my heart. I need to get it out somehow. There is a fine line between being set apart and falling apart. I am learning how to dance on that delicate line. I have the bruises on my heart to show for it. But it is a dance that I am soooo willing to learn, regardless of the pain. Know why? Because I know that there is more. I know that the obstacles in my life are stepping stones... and the things that I have learned and am learning, I am supposed to share with others. One scraped knee at a time... I am helping to pave the way and shine the light. Please do not let all of this be in vain. Please.....
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
Friday, December 22, 2006
Pirate Joe
Do you remember me writing about how my life will never be considered boring? Well, here is another exerpt explaining why!
The boys and I had some errands to run, which seems to be pretty typical these days. I was all ready to go when Josh informed me that he had to get dressed. He already had his clothes on, so I did not know what he meant. Well... I sure did find out! See the pic of him and his brother in the shopping cart. He decided to put on his Captain Feathersword (from the Wiggles, for those of you who are not cool enough to know that off hand!), his red PowerRanger gloves and a ripped up cardboard wrapping paper tube up on his arm. He told me he was "Pirate Joe" and had to protect me from the bad guys. How can I argue with that? So we went to Office Depot all dressed up and got many an interesting look. Some guy tried to ask us if we needed help and Josh told him to "leave my mommy alone if you are the bad, mean man!" Alas, a man to fight for my honor!
Slacker - NO MORE! First of many updates...
OK, OK... I know it has been a while. We have been busy little bees over here! There is much to tell and stories to share. I will *try* to do a condensed version, but our "happennings" usually cannot be condensed. LOL.
Hmmm... well we had our Sunday School's Christmas Party on the 10th. That was a BLAST! All of the kids had tons of fun and we had a visit from Santa. Most of the grown ups enjoyed watching yours truly making a fool of herself trying to do the parallel bars and the monkey bars (you know where you lay on the bar across your hips and swing over it). It did not happen because I am too chicken, but I was trying. Seems as though since I have lost all of this weight that I am losing some inhibitions.... I will try this again when there is not an audience :o). The highlight of the afternoon was definitely the visit from the guy in red suit. A little background here before I continue. Josh has been wanting this thing called a "kingdom castle" for almost a year now. It is retired and I haven't been able to find it... so for the majority of the year, I have been telling him we will talk to santa about it. Well, mommy hooked santa up on ebay about a month ago and Josh will have the surprise of his life on Christmas morning (go mommy!!). We have been practicing asking Santa for this thing. Well I never put two and two together. We had some adorable stuffed animals donated to us from the Rotary Club of Keystone-Sunrise (Shameless plug for them... they deserve it!!) to hand out from Santa to the kids. Everyone lined up and waited for their turn. I could see Josh was excited, but I was determined to not play favorites and called several children up before him. This was the first year that he has ever wanted to go and see Santa all on his own! It was very exciting for me. So I get everyone ready with the cameras and call Josh up to the big guy. He tells Santa "Merry Christmas!" and waits expectantly for his gift. And he was handed a gray stuffed donkey with little red hearts on his ears. Josh just looked at him like "What in the heck is this???" THAT is when it dawned on me that Josh was expecting his "kingdom castle." I was heartbroken for him. The sheer look of disappointment went from his face to his entire body as he took his place back on the mat. He sat there and crossed his arms and pouted while looking at the donkey. My poor precious boy! I took him aside and talked to him and explained that Christmas was still coming and he was going to get other presents for Jesus' birthday and this was just an extra gift. He seemed ok with that. But just to see how his little brain is working and making all of these connections... it was amazing. I have definitely gotten more than my share for Christmas this year.
Saturday, December 9, 2006
Transformers
Yesterday afternoon the boys and I were just hanging out in the living room finishing up some decorating. I had my back turned to them for about 10 minutes and when I turned around, Josh had gotten into my school bag. He found my sticky flags and had used the entire packet on his face! I so wanted to be mad, but all I could do was burst out laughing at him. I asked him, "Josh, what did you do?" "Mommy, I a transformer!"
Then he said, "Watch me! I changing into a car!" and he pulled all of the stickers off of his face and stuck them up his arms.Wow, buddy! That is cool. Amazing! That he made the connection to "transform" himself in that way... unbelievable! He went over and hugged Topher after he "saved" him from the pile of pillows on the couch. Then Josh told me to lay down. He said that I was going to be a transformer, too! OK! He found the purple stickers, because I am a girl, and made me a purple transformer. I told him that he did a fabulous job and then told him I was going to make him a purple one, too! We had a blast! Just like the song says... Transformers, more than meets the eye! Transformers, robots in disguise! Or maybe we should change it to goofballs in disguise! Happy Saturday! Love, Reese
Then he said, "Watch me! I changing into a car!" and he pulled all of the stickers off of his face and stuck them up his arms.Wow, buddy! That is cool. Amazing! That he made the connection to "transform" himself in that way... unbelievable! He went over and hugged Topher after he "saved" him from the pile of pillows on the couch. Then Josh told me to lay down. He said that I was going to be a transformer, too! OK! He found the purple stickers, because I am a girl, and made me a purple transformer. I told him that he did a fabulous job and then told him I was going to make him a purple one, too! We had a blast! Just like the song says... Transformers, more than meets the eye! Transformers, robots in disguise! Or maybe we should change it to goofballs in disguise! Happy Saturday! Love, Reese
Friday, December 8, 2006
I figured it out!
Ok.. you are in for it now.. I bought a cord for the digital camera and I have figured out how to post the pics. At least I think that I have!
I am warning you... I am camera happy.
Here are a few that I wanted to share from recent postings.... This first one is of Topher and his friend that was running after him the whole time at the Christmas party. And then there is Josh and one of the chickens in the petting zoo. And the one at the top is the three of us by the GIANT birthday cake blowup in the barn after dinner. I am gonna work on this picture thing.... as I have more to share!
Sometimes I wish...
that I was the one with Autism. To be able to retreat into the world of my own mind and not worry about or even care about what everyone is thinking or saying about me. It must be a nice place to go to escape. I wouldn't want to go there forever, just for a nice vacation. I start to muse about this from time to time... usually when I have had a hard week or get some bad news or a reality check. I will expand about the bad news and a reality check in my next blog. I am still decompressing from it... but here is a part that I can share now:
With taking the boys out of school, I have had more resistance that I ever imagined from other special needs parents. These are the same parents who tell me how their children are eligible for services but do not receive them in school. They also share that they do not see any real improvement with their kids, but they "have to" send them to such and such school. Or they fight and expend all of this energy trying to fight for what they believe their child needs but then end the day (or year, or years) still discouraged and disappointed with the outcome. Maybe I am being "attacked" because I am stepping out to do what they themselves cannot bring themselves to do. Yes, that is what I will choose to believe.
On another note, lots has happened this week. Looking back they are humorous, but when you are smack in the middle of it and there are eyes peering at you and mumbles about your kids and your parenting skills, you would give anything to crawl under a rock or into that safe little world.
Here is the play by play:
**This was actually a fun one! We went to Lowe's to get some wood, you know, to fix my broken table from the last catastrophe. I am not a carpenter, but I will make an effort! I like to pretend that I like to do all of the home improvement stuff, but I think that I am just intrigued by it all. At the end of the day, I would rather pay someone to do it for me. :o) Anyways, we were driving into the parking lot and the guys were unloading a fresh batch of Christmas trees. They were in the semi full of ice blocks. As they pulled the trees out, the guys threw the ice onto the ground. It looked like the sky opened up right there and had a fresh snowfall. I pulled over and got the boys out to play with the snow. It was great! The guys were laughing at me, but I told them that the boys had never seen snow before. We had our own mini-snowball fight! It was lots of fun! Then Topher took a handful of this ice and tried to eat it. That is when I knew our experience was complete and we got back into the car.
*We went to Sam's to pick up our quarterly bulk supplies. The ex came along as it was his night with the boys but they did not want to leave me. So all of us (mom, the boys, the ex, and I) are trekking through Sam's. Topher is running around and driving me nuts because he is not listening. I am in the middle of picking up boxes of pull-ups and all of a sudden the fire alarm goes off. My precious little angel tried to go through the emergency exit and set off the alarm. The ex and the mom are just kinda standing there watching. I was mortified. This guy comes running and I am apologizing. Josh is screaming because it is so loud and hurting his ears. Topher is stunned and looking like, "What the heck did I do?" I scoop him up and put him into the cart and he starts screaming. I believe he was louder than the alarm. Once it all stopped, Josh kept saying, "No push the red buttons!" How can I possibly explain when to push the buttons when the noise that results from it causes him so much pain?
*Earlier this week I dared to go into the Wal-Mart. It is absolutely nutso in there during the rest of the year, but at Christmas time, it is way beyond crazy. I was getting frustrated with the crowds and the piles of crap for sale everywhere in the middle of every single aisle. I said to the boys, "Hey guys, this store is bananas!" And Josh, without missing a beat replies, "No Mommy, this store is a Wal-mart!" I stand corrected.
*We were driving home and Josh had his feet up in the air, propped up on the back of my seat. He kept kicking them and was flinging his arms around while making some strange sounds. I was trying to figure out what the heck he was doing, so I asked him: "What are you doing?" And he said; Um, nothing. So I asked again... this was after he was really getting into the feet tapping and hand moving. "Josh, what on earth are you doing?" "Mommy, I just singing a song!" Oh, excuse me!
*We were at Super Target. (Can you tell that we have alot of errands? It is because I never get to finish the list I start - we usually leave mid-shopping in order to alleviate a disaster). On a side note, I *love* Super Target. I can get all I need without all of the craziness of Wal-Mart... AND there is a Starbucks! I have never been a coffee drinker before this year, but now I am addicted. I have fallen head over heels for their Peppermint Mocha Lattes, and last night I treated myself to a Venti! WooHoo! They even have cute little cup holders for the cart so you don't have to carry the cup in the store. Talk about luxury! Anyways, we were checking out and I was loading the cart. Topher was running around and not listening (do you see a theme here?). We had gone out to the garden center and collected some broken branches to decorate our nativity scene with and they were occupying the majority of the cart. I was tired of the comments and stares because of Topher's blatant disobedience. He was saying stuff like, "Get off of me mommy!" and "You cut it out now!" I do not know where he gets this from... seriously! So I caught him and went to put him into the child seat in the cart. He is a big boy - he weighs 50 pounds and is only3! (I have nightmares that we are going to end up on Maury Povich, but he really is just a big boy - think linebacker material!). The bad thing about his size is that he knows how to use it to his advantage. He flailed backwards and nearly knocked me over. I persevered though and managed to get him into the seat. He then made a final attempt to wiggle out of the chair, and that is when it happened. Topher pushed and kicked and sent my latte flying. All over him, the bags, the counter, my left side, my sweatshirt, and of course the floor! The cashier was stunned. I put him back into the seat while he is screaming and started trying to gain my composure. I asked for some towels. She handed me 2. I told her I would need more than that. She ignored me. I think she was trying to finish up to get us out of there. I do not blame her. I cleaned up most of the carnage but the floor was still a mess. Now I believe that if we cause something at a store, we need to clean it up. The cashier came around to put the last bag in the cart and said, "Oh my! That is a big mess! I will call someone." I was even more mortified. She leaned over and said, trying to be reassuring, "It is ok, we have messes all of the time." I glanced at the distinguished gentleman in line behind us who had been rolling his eyes the entire time and the ladies in the next line that were smirking at us and just responded: "So do we honey, so do we." I paid our bill and left. As we are walking out of the store, my babies look at me and say "Sorry, Mommy." Me too guys, me too.
The sad part? I think that most of the reason I was upset was that I only got to drink half of my latte. I am so pathetic....
So the next time you are enjoying your Starbucks, just smile and think of me.
Have a great Friday and a fabulous weekend! We have lots planned, including a Christmas play and our Sunday School class's Christmas Party. The boys are excited! I am too... I think! :o)
Love, Reese
With taking the boys out of school, I have had more resistance that I ever imagined from other special needs parents. These are the same parents who tell me how their children are eligible for services but do not receive them in school. They also share that they do not see any real improvement with their kids, but they "have to" send them to such and such school. Or they fight and expend all of this energy trying to fight for what they believe their child needs but then end the day (or year, or years) still discouraged and disappointed with the outcome. Maybe I am being "attacked" because I am stepping out to do what they themselves cannot bring themselves to do. Yes, that is what I will choose to believe.
On another note, lots has happened this week. Looking back they are humorous, but when you are smack in the middle of it and there are eyes peering at you and mumbles about your kids and your parenting skills, you would give anything to crawl under a rock or into that safe little world.
Here is the play by play:
**This was actually a fun one! We went to Lowe's to get some wood, you know, to fix my broken table from the last catastrophe. I am not a carpenter, but I will make an effort! I like to pretend that I like to do all of the home improvement stuff, but I think that I am just intrigued by it all. At the end of the day, I would rather pay someone to do it for me. :o) Anyways, we were driving into the parking lot and the guys were unloading a fresh batch of Christmas trees. They were in the semi full of ice blocks. As they pulled the trees out, the guys threw the ice onto the ground. It looked like the sky opened up right there and had a fresh snowfall. I pulled over and got the boys out to play with the snow. It was great! The guys were laughing at me, but I told them that the boys had never seen snow before. We had our own mini-snowball fight! It was lots of fun! Then Topher took a handful of this ice and tried to eat it. That is when I knew our experience was complete and we got back into the car.
*We went to Sam's to pick up our quarterly bulk supplies. The ex came along as it was his night with the boys but they did not want to leave me. So all of us (mom, the boys, the ex, and I) are trekking through Sam's. Topher is running around and driving me nuts because he is not listening. I am in the middle of picking up boxes of pull-ups and all of a sudden the fire alarm goes off. My precious little angel tried to go through the emergency exit and set off the alarm. The ex and the mom are just kinda standing there watching. I was mortified. This guy comes running and I am apologizing. Josh is screaming because it is so loud and hurting his ears. Topher is stunned and looking like, "What the heck did I do?" I scoop him up and put him into the cart and he starts screaming. I believe he was louder than the alarm. Once it all stopped, Josh kept saying, "No push the red buttons!" How can I possibly explain when to push the buttons when the noise that results from it causes him so much pain?
*Earlier this week I dared to go into the Wal-Mart. It is absolutely nutso in there during the rest of the year, but at Christmas time, it is way beyond crazy. I was getting frustrated with the crowds and the piles of crap for sale everywhere in the middle of every single aisle. I said to the boys, "Hey guys, this store is bananas!" And Josh, without missing a beat replies, "No Mommy, this store is a Wal-mart!" I stand corrected.
*We were driving home and Josh had his feet up in the air, propped up on the back of my seat. He kept kicking them and was flinging his arms around while making some strange sounds. I was trying to figure out what the heck he was doing, so I asked him: "What are you doing?" And he said; Um, nothing. So I asked again... this was after he was really getting into the feet tapping and hand moving. "Josh, what on earth are you doing?" "Mommy, I just singing a song!" Oh, excuse me!
*We were at Super Target. (Can you tell that we have alot of errands? It is because I never get to finish the list I start - we usually leave mid-shopping in order to alleviate a disaster). On a side note, I *love* Super Target. I can get all I need without all of the craziness of Wal-Mart... AND there is a Starbucks! I have never been a coffee drinker before this year, but now I am addicted. I have fallen head over heels for their Peppermint Mocha Lattes, and last night I treated myself to a Venti! WooHoo! They even have cute little cup holders for the cart so you don't have to carry the cup in the store. Talk about luxury! Anyways, we were checking out and I was loading the cart. Topher was running around and not listening (do you see a theme here?). We had gone out to the garden center and collected some broken branches to decorate our nativity scene with and they were occupying the majority of the cart. I was tired of the comments and stares because of Topher's blatant disobedience. He was saying stuff like, "Get off of me mommy!" and "You cut it out now!" I do not know where he gets this from... seriously! So I caught him and went to put him into the child seat in the cart. He is a big boy - he weighs 50 pounds and is only3! (I have nightmares that we are going to end up on Maury Povich, but he really is just a big boy - think linebacker material!). The bad thing about his size is that he knows how to use it to his advantage. He flailed backwards and nearly knocked me over. I persevered though and managed to get him into the seat. He then made a final attempt to wiggle out of the chair, and that is when it happened. Topher pushed and kicked and sent my latte flying. All over him, the bags, the counter, my left side, my sweatshirt, and of course the floor! The cashier was stunned. I put him back into the seat while he is screaming and started trying to gain my composure. I asked for some towels. She handed me 2. I told her I would need more than that. She ignored me. I think she was trying to finish up to get us out of there. I do not blame her. I cleaned up most of the carnage but the floor was still a mess. Now I believe that if we cause something at a store, we need to clean it up. The cashier came around to put the last bag in the cart and said, "Oh my! That is a big mess! I will call someone." I was even more mortified. She leaned over and said, trying to be reassuring, "It is ok, we have messes all of the time." I glanced at the distinguished gentleman in line behind us who had been rolling his eyes the entire time and the ladies in the next line that were smirking at us and just responded: "So do we honey, so do we." I paid our bill and left. As we are walking out of the store, my babies look at me and say "Sorry, Mommy." Me too guys, me too.
The sad part? I think that most of the reason I was upset was that I only got to drink half of my latte. I am so pathetic....
So the next time you are enjoying your Starbucks, just smile and think of me.
Have a great Friday and a fabulous weekend! We have lots planned, including a Christmas play and our Sunday School class's Christmas Party. The boys are excited! I am too... I think! :o)
Love, Reese
Monday, December 4, 2006
The Christmas Party at the Ranch
Saturday afternoon we attended our special needs Christmas party. It is put on by a couple at their *beautiful* ranch and is an outreach from another church. There was a flying elephant ride, a spinning dragon ride, two bounce houses, a petting zoo, pony rides, and lots and lots of people. It was SO fun! This party is definitely one of my favorite events of the season. It is specifically for families and friends of children with special needs and everyone there either has a loved one with a disability, or works/volunteers in a program for people with disabilities.
The first year I was invited, I was a nervous wreck trying to keep up with my boys and apologizing for their condition. That has changed!
After being asked and then flat out told to not worry about the boys and allow the people there to help me and allow myself to relax, I finally listened! There is a petite blonde lady who Topher just adores. Since his thing is running (think Forrest Gump - from then on, if there was someplace to go, I was running! That's my Topher) she just kept running right along with him and after him. Watching her made me realize that it is no wonder I am so tired all of the time! lol
We did have one small incident where a volunteer dad had a conniption by the bounce house. He started saying very loudly, "Whoever this kid belongs to, he needs to get out of here because he is hitting and spitting!!" I, of course, was mortified to learn that I was the one the kid belonged to. It was Joshua. He was blowing raspberries at all of the kids. I did not see all that transpired, but I asked him what he did, and he said he made nice, nice to the little boy's face. To Josh, "nice, nice" is smooshing another person's face between his hands and getting so close to them that he can smell their skin. It is one of his "things." Admittedly, taken out of context, it could appear threatening. I made him apologize, took him from the bounce thing, and went for a walk. The whole time he was saying, "No! My friend and my Christmas party!" I felt guilty for falling prey to another parent. I am not sure if I handled it correctly or not. I did take Josh back to the house thingy and made him apologize and tell the little boy that he wouldn't smoosh him anymore. Then he went back in to play. The dad had a look on his face that I am sure would have hurt me if looks had actions behind them. The funny part is that just 20 minutes before this, both the boy and Josh were on one of the rides together because his son was afraid to ride alone. I really think this whole thing was blown out of proportion and was a case of not seeing the disability, just a brat. You see what you want to see.
On a more positive note, here are some highlights:
*There was a petting zoo there with ducks, chickens, a goat, rabbits, guinea pigs, and a pot belly pig. The last time we were there, Josh wanted NOTHING to do with the animals. He was afraid. This time, he jumped right into the fence and sat there until he had the chance to hold *every* single animal. At one point, he told the lady that he wanted to hold "that one." She thought he meant the guinea pig, so she asked him, "You want the guinea pig this time?" And he said, "No! I don't wanna skinny pig! I want the big fat pig!" Priceless! He wanted, and made the woman, pick up the pot bellied pig and put it on his lap. The poor thing was grunting and squealing, but he got up there. Josh thought it was the best thing in the world!
*There was also horse and pony rides. Topher took his ride while I was in the bathroom with Josh. So I missed this, but EVERYONE told me about it afterwards. Evidently, my little one got on the horse and was a bit uneasy at first. Then he realized what he was doing, grinned from ear to ear and said "Yee haw!" while throwing his arm in the air like he was gonna lasso a cow! The kid is such a nut!
*At the end of the night, we were going to take pictures - on a side note, as soon as I figure this out, I will have pics on here! There was a huge birthday cake for Jesus on the stage in the barn where we had dinner. I rally the boys together and asked Elizabeth to take our picture. Topher, without missing a beat, gets on the stage and looks out to the crowd and says, "Ladies and gentlemen!" Needless to say, he stole the show at that point.
So that wraps up another adventure for the Fraser boys. We have errands to run today and a few appointments and then we are baking this evening. I cannot wait to see what gifts we will share throughout this day. Blessings and laughter to you all!! Love, Reese
The first year I was invited, I was a nervous wreck trying to keep up with my boys and apologizing for their condition. That has changed!
After being asked and then flat out told to not worry about the boys and allow the people there to help me and allow myself to relax, I finally listened! There is a petite blonde lady who Topher just adores. Since his thing is running (think Forrest Gump - from then on, if there was someplace to go, I was running! That's my Topher) she just kept running right along with him and after him. Watching her made me realize that it is no wonder I am so tired all of the time! lol
We did have one small incident where a volunteer dad had a conniption by the bounce house. He started saying very loudly, "Whoever this kid belongs to, he needs to get out of here because he is hitting and spitting!!" I, of course, was mortified to learn that I was the one the kid belonged to. It was Joshua. He was blowing raspberries at all of the kids. I did not see all that transpired, but I asked him what he did, and he said he made nice, nice to the little boy's face. To Josh, "nice, nice" is smooshing another person's face between his hands and getting so close to them that he can smell their skin. It is one of his "things." Admittedly, taken out of context, it could appear threatening. I made him apologize, took him from the bounce thing, and went for a walk. The whole time he was saying, "No! My friend and my Christmas party!" I felt guilty for falling prey to another parent. I am not sure if I handled it correctly or not. I did take Josh back to the house thingy and made him apologize and tell the little boy that he wouldn't smoosh him anymore. Then he went back in to play. The dad had a look on his face that I am sure would have hurt me if looks had actions behind them. The funny part is that just 20 minutes before this, both the boy and Josh were on one of the rides together because his son was afraid to ride alone. I really think this whole thing was blown out of proportion and was a case of not seeing the disability, just a brat. You see what you want to see.
On a more positive note, here are some highlights:
*There was a petting zoo there with ducks, chickens, a goat, rabbits, guinea pigs, and a pot belly pig. The last time we were there, Josh wanted NOTHING to do with the animals. He was afraid. This time, he jumped right into the fence and sat there until he had the chance to hold *every* single animal. At one point, he told the lady that he wanted to hold "that one." She thought he meant the guinea pig, so she asked him, "You want the guinea pig this time?" And he said, "No! I don't wanna skinny pig! I want the big fat pig!" Priceless! He wanted, and made the woman, pick up the pot bellied pig and put it on his lap. The poor thing was grunting and squealing, but he got up there. Josh thought it was the best thing in the world!
*There was also horse and pony rides. Topher took his ride while I was in the bathroom with Josh. So I missed this, but EVERYONE told me about it afterwards. Evidently, my little one got on the horse and was a bit uneasy at first. Then he realized what he was doing, grinned from ear to ear and said "Yee haw!" while throwing his arm in the air like he was gonna lasso a cow! The kid is such a nut!
*At the end of the night, we were going to take pictures - on a side note, as soon as I figure this out, I will have pics on here! There was a huge birthday cake for Jesus on the stage in the barn where we had dinner. I rally the boys together and asked Elizabeth to take our picture. Topher, without missing a beat, gets on the stage and looks out to the crowd and says, "Ladies and gentlemen!" Needless to say, he stole the show at that point.
So that wraps up another adventure for the Fraser boys. We have errands to run today and a few appointments and then we are baking this evening. I cannot wait to see what gifts we will share throughout this day. Blessings and laughter to you all!! Love, Reese
Saturday, December 2, 2006
This week's news....
I have been a BUSY GIRL!! So I wanted to share the highlights of my week.
Let me begin by saying that I had *NO CLUE* that so many people found my blog so interesting. It warms my heart to have people ask me when I am going to post again. Thanks for the encouragement!!
So let's get down to business:
What am I thinking???
-I have made the decision to homeschool my children. I would like to tell you that I am confident in my ability to educate and impart wisdom and knowledge into two small, amazingly important individuals; however, I am **extremely** concerned that I will totally screw them up. But then I stop and think about the events that have transpired to lead me to this decision and I realize that the boys are getting screwed up in the school system, so I cannot do any worse than that! Besides, I am their mom and I love them. So if you love the ones that you screw up, it makes a difference, right? :o)
But seriously.. we have all heard that "the Lord works in mysterious ways." Well, I have had a few "confirmations" that I am supposed to do the whole homeschool thing.
-The boys have had an AMAZING week. No major meltdowns or temper tantrums. Just the typical, "I am your brother and it is my mission in life to hurt you" stuff.
-Friday was our co-op pick up day. We had to get the milk, eggs, and coconut oil. On the way to the milk, the boys were telling me how we drink the yummy cow milk and that cows are black and white and say "moo!" To me, that constitutes learning.
-When we left milk and eggs, on our way to coconut oil, Josh asked me where we were going. I told him to go get our coconut oil. And he said, "Oh! We are going to the beach!" I was a bit confused and asked him to clarify what he said, and he reiterated that he thought we were going to the beach. I asked him what we were going to do there, and he proceeded to tell me that we were going to climb a tree at the beach by the water to get the coconuts. Now THAT is learning! How on earth he came up with that on his own is beyond me. But since we are now homeschooling and it happened the first week that I, his mother, am teaching him, I know that somehow I imparted this great wisdom to him. (Stop laughing.)
-Allowing my boys to watch Dora the Explorer while I finish up a paper actually was a good thing! I know the opinion of using TV as a babysitter, but as mentioned in previous postings, you are not here, but you can be to take the TV's place and you are welcome to offer! We have been introduced to Swiper the fox who, from what I can surmise, is the guy who tries to foil Dora's adventures. The boys really like him. Their latest catchphrase is "Swiper, no swiping!" and then they say "Oh man!" Well, this morning this whole thing turned into a lesson! Woo hoo!! We drew a picture of Swiper and wrote his name on a piece of paper and then Josh copied the picture and wrote the name too. Art and spelling are done for the day! Go mommy, go mommy! :o)
-Topher is standing next to me as I write this doing a puzzle. He was just naming all of the animals as he put them in the frame. He kept saying "the caw." What the crap is a caw? I know he can say cow.. so that couldn't be it. I looked at the puzzle and had him redo it. He was calling the PARROT a MACAW. Genius. Sheer genius.
My School News
-I had a group presentation on Wednesday and Elizabeth and Dancing Queen (see the Me and My Gang post) came to observe. It was in my *favorite* class of this semester. Our group has really become a little family and everyone did a FABULOUS job. I was so proud. We really set the bar for the other groups. Sorry guys! Of course, we got an "A" because we rock! Guys, is that still cool?
-I also had a presentation in another class about some volunteer work that we had to do. I talked about working with kids with disabilities. Somehow I ended up talking about my boys and autism for 25 minutes when it was supposed to be a 7 minute presentation. Shocker. Everyone kept asking me tons of questions, which I of course was all too happy to answer. I think that I threw them off though when I started off with my friend AirBear flashing the lights and the tape recorder blaring while I read "Brown Bear." I love the dramatics... I think that is probably a good thing considering my life! :o)
Three Little Words
-This was actually going to be it's own post. And I may delve deeper into this subject at a later date. But... have you ever noticed that sentences that contain just three words are the most vulnerable ones that you can utter? I am not just talking about the one that your mind jumped to when you read the title, although it does count. Here are some that I wanted to SCREAM at some point in the last month:
*I need help.
*I am tired.
*I am stressed.
*Are you listening? (not sarcastically.. just more do you really hear me?)
*I feel alone.
*I am tired.
*I need help. (Yes, I know I already said these, but they are worth repeating!)
*I need sleep. (This is not the same thing as I am tired.)
*I feel isolated.
*I needa vacation. (technically a 4 word, but I am the author and editor, so I made it a three word one!)
So yes, I have been feeling vulerable. Being tired and running ragged will do that to you. But I am learning to delegate and to say "No" more often. One of my most important lessons that I learned this week came from the "Wonderpets"... sometimes you have to ask for help, no matter who you are. Enough said.
I do have one more three word sentence that I must share.. and let you know that above all of the other ones, this is the most important and the one that remains a constant in my life regardless of all the rest.
***I am blessed.***
We got jokes!
-I just looked into the living room and saw my 5 year old sitting on top of an upside down hamper. I didn't think too much of it as he is a climber and likes to find obscure places to sit up on. Then I was wondering where the 3 year old was. Yep, he was UNDER the hamper and Josh was sitting on top of him. I am telling you, it never ends!
-The boys heard a commercial for a cake mix earlier this week on the radio. It went something like this:
First Lady - I brought my fruit cake to this party and it has been pushed to the back of the dessert table.
Second Lady - I made this delicious (insert sarcastic smirk from me here) chocolate tort from the boxed cake mix company and it is almost gone!
The go back and forth about how easy and yummy it is and then you hear the first lady say to a bunch of giggling kids.. "Hey, put that down! Its not a football its a fruitcake!" Josh literally laughed for 5 straight minutes at this. He got the joke! Now, you just have to say to him, Put that down! Its not a football! and he starts rolling all over again.
My favorite sound in the world? My boys laughter! It is even better when it is over a joke that they have made the connection to understand. What a gift!
Upcoming Events - In other words, potential storymakers!
-We have a Christmas party tonight at a ranch/farm. We had a blast the last time we went to it... and we are SO looking forward to it! I think that I am more excited than the boys.
-I have been informed by the boys that we are making Christmas cookies this week. Um.. ok! I am game. Please pray for us! :o) Last time we made cookies, when they came out of the oven, Josh asked me where the bricks came from. Nice.
Other Tidbits
-We went to the electric company to pay our bill yesterday. They have a tree in the lobby and the two large desks/podiums were wrapped as presents - right down to the big red bows on top. Josh and Topher ran right up to them and screamed "Thank you Santa!! My presents are here!" Do you know how hard it is to try to stop two boys on opposite ends of the lobby from opening the pretend presents? Then they wanted to help redecorate the tree.
-Usually when we go to Wal-Mart, one of the boys has an "issue." This last time, I was amazed because neither of them screamed or did the "alligator death roll" about anything. They did, however, put on quite a show for the other customers. Both boys starting singing "Life is a highway, I wanna ride it all night long" on the top of their lungs in the checkout line. Yes folks, now when you go to Wal-mart, you get a free show! At least these stares were for a good reason! Times like these I just want to zip up in a pocket in my heart.
-I went to see Joel Osteen on Thursday night and had the pleasure of meeting a very nice person who sat next to me. The entire experience warmed my heart and touched me on a level that I cannot seem to put into words. I am thankful and will treasure that night for a long time.
Ok.. I am off to change some laundry and make preparations for the day. Also to referree the boys. That is a job that NEVER ends! Have a great weekend everyone!
Let me begin by saying that I had *NO CLUE* that so many people found my blog so interesting. It warms my heart to have people ask me when I am going to post again. Thanks for the encouragement!!
So let's get down to business:
What am I thinking???
-I have made the decision to homeschool my children. I would like to tell you that I am confident in my ability to educate and impart wisdom and knowledge into two small, amazingly important individuals; however, I am **extremely** concerned that I will totally screw them up. But then I stop and think about the events that have transpired to lead me to this decision and I realize that the boys are getting screwed up in the school system, so I cannot do any worse than that! Besides, I am their mom and I love them. So if you love the ones that you screw up, it makes a difference, right? :o)
But seriously.. we have all heard that "the Lord works in mysterious ways." Well, I have had a few "confirmations" that I am supposed to do the whole homeschool thing.
-The boys have had an AMAZING week. No major meltdowns or temper tantrums. Just the typical, "I am your brother and it is my mission in life to hurt you" stuff.
-Friday was our co-op pick up day. We had to get the milk, eggs, and coconut oil. On the way to the milk, the boys were telling me how we drink the yummy cow milk and that cows are black and white and say "moo!" To me, that constitutes learning.
-When we left milk and eggs, on our way to coconut oil, Josh asked me where we were going. I told him to go get our coconut oil. And he said, "Oh! We are going to the beach!" I was a bit confused and asked him to clarify what he said, and he reiterated that he thought we were going to the beach. I asked him what we were going to do there, and he proceeded to tell me that we were going to climb a tree at the beach by the water to get the coconuts. Now THAT is learning! How on earth he came up with that on his own is beyond me. But since we are now homeschooling and it happened the first week that I, his mother, am teaching him, I know that somehow I imparted this great wisdom to him. (Stop laughing.)
-Allowing my boys to watch Dora the Explorer while I finish up a paper actually was a good thing! I know the opinion of using TV as a babysitter, but as mentioned in previous postings, you are not here, but you can be to take the TV's place and you are welcome to offer! We have been introduced to Swiper the fox who, from what I can surmise, is the guy who tries to foil Dora's adventures. The boys really like him. Their latest catchphrase is "Swiper, no swiping!" and then they say "Oh man!" Well, this morning this whole thing turned into a lesson! Woo hoo!! We drew a picture of Swiper and wrote his name on a piece of paper and then Josh copied the picture and wrote the name too. Art and spelling are done for the day! Go mommy, go mommy! :o)
-Topher is standing next to me as I write this doing a puzzle. He was just naming all of the animals as he put them in the frame. He kept saying "the caw." What the crap is a caw? I know he can say cow.. so that couldn't be it. I looked at the puzzle and had him redo it. He was calling the PARROT a MACAW. Genius. Sheer genius.
My School News
-I had a group presentation on Wednesday and Elizabeth and Dancing Queen (see the Me and My Gang post) came to observe. It was in my *favorite* class of this semester. Our group has really become a little family and everyone did a FABULOUS job. I was so proud. We really set the bar for the other groups. Sorry guys! Of course, we got an "A" because we rock! Guys, is that still cool?
-I also had a presentation in another class about some volunteer work that we had to do. I talked about working with kids with disabilities. Somehow I ended up talking about my boys and autism for 25 minutes when it was supposed to be a 7 minute presentation. Shocker. Everyone kept asking me tons of questions, which I of course was all too happy to answer. I think that I threw them off though when I started off with my friend AirBear flashing the lights and the tape recorder blaring while I read "Brown Bear." I love the dramatics... I think that is probably a good thing considering my life! :o)
Three Little Words
-This was actually going to be it's own post. And I may delve deeper into this subject at a later date. But... have you ever noticed that sentences that contain just three words are the most vulnerable ones that you can utter? I am not just talking about the one that your mind jumped to when you read the title, although it does count. Here are some that I wanted to SCREAM at some point in the last month:
*I need help.
*I am tired.
*I am stressed.
*Are you listening? (not sarcastically.. just more do you really hear me?)
*I feel alone.
*I am tired.
*I need help. (Yes, I know I already said these, but they are worth repeating!)
*I need sleep. (This is not the same thing as I am tired.)
*I feel isolated.
*I needa vacation. (technically a 4 word, but I am the author and editor, so I made it a three word one!)
So yes, I have been feeling vulerable. Being tired and running ragged will do that to you. But I am learning to delegate and to say "No" more often. One of my most important lessons that I learned this week came from the "Wonderpets"... sometimes you have to ask for help, no matter who you are. Enough said.
I do have one more three word sentence that I must share.. and let you know that above all of the other ones, this is the most important and the one that remains a constant in my life regardless of all the rest.
***I am blessed.***
We got jokes!
-I just looked into the living room and saw my 5 year old sitting on top of an upside down hamper. I didn't think too much of it as he is a climber and likes to find obscure places to sit up on. Then I was wondering where the 3 year old was. Yep, he was UNDER the hamper and Josh was sitting on top of him. I am telling you, it never ends!
-The boys heard a commercial for a cake mix earlier this week on the radio. It went something like this:
First Lady - I brought my fruit cake to this party and it has been pushed to the back of the dessert table.
Second Lady - I made this delicious (insert sarcastic smirk from me here) chocolate tort from the boxed cake mix company and it is almost gone!
The go back and forth about how easy and yummy it is and then you hear the first lady say to a bunch of giggling kids.. "Hey, put that down! Its not a football its a fruitcake!" Josh literally laughed for 5 straight minutes at this. He got the joke! Now, you just have to say to him, Put that down! Its not a football! and he starts rolling all over again.
My favorite sound in the world? My boys laughter! It is even better when it is over a joke that they have made the connection to understand. What a gift!
Upcoming Events - In other words, potential storymakers!
-We have a Christmas party tonight at a ranch/farm. We had a blast the last time we went to it... and we are SO looking forward to it! I think that I am more excited than the boys.
-I have been informed by the boys that we are making Christmas cookies this week. Um.. ok! I am game. Please pray for us! :o) Last time we made cookies, when they came out of the oven, Josh asked me where the bricks came from. Nice.
Other Tidbits
-We went to the electric company to pay our bill yesterday. They have a tree in the lobby and the two large desks/podiums were wrapped as presents - right down to the big red bows on top. Josh and Topher ran right up to them and screamed "Thank you Santa!! My presents are here!" Do you know how hard it is to try to stop two boys on opposite ends of the lobby from opening the pretend presents? Then they wanted to help redecorate the tree.
-Usually when we go to Wal-Mart, one of the boys has an "issue." This last time, I was amazed because neither of them screamed or did the "alligator death roll" about anything. They did, however, put on quite a show for the other customers. Both boys starting singing "Life is a highway, I wanna ride it all night long" on the top of their lungs in the checkout line. Yes folks, now when you go to Wal-mart, you get a free show! At least these stares were for a good reason! Times like these I just want to zip up in a pocket in my heart.
-I went to see Joel Osteen on Thursday night and had the pleasure of meeting a very nice person who sat next to me. The entire experience warmed my heart and touched me on a level that I cannot seem to put into words. I am thankful and will treasure that night for a long time.
Ok.. I am off to change some laundry and make preparations for the day. Also to referree the boys. That is a job that NEVER ends! Have a great weekend everyone!
Friday, December 1, 2006
Comments
Ok... anyone can comment on the blogs now. I had a few complaints that people could not leave feedback... but I figured out how to change it so you are all set.
Be forewarned: Any crude or vulgar language will be removed!
Thanks!
By the way, if you leave a comment, make sure you leave your name so I know who you are!!!
Be forewarned: Any crude or vulgar language will be removed!
Thanks!
By the way, if you leave a comment, make sure you leave your name so I know who you are!!!
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